Where in your life do you need to grant yourself permission?
As children, many of us learn to chase approval. I know I did. At school, I craved external validation.
In primary school, I loved being the fastest at times tables and getting 100% in spelling tests. In high school, I craved the 'As' in my school reports, the awards and the thrill of making the interschool team. Each recognition felt like proof that I was enough.
But when I left school, all of that disappeared. No gold stars. No teachers cheering me on. No awards and no applause.
I started my post school career with the sensible thing: I enrolled in a pharmacy degree. But six months into it, I withdrew. It felt like everyone else knew where they were going, and I didn’t. Stepping away felt like such failure at the time. My self-esteem was low and I floundered for so long, trying to work out what I wanted to do with my life. I wasn’t used to not achieving. I wasn’t used to feeling lost.
Eventually, I did find my way back to pharmacy. University was the path everyone, even I, had always imagined for me: gaining a respected degree which would lead to a stable career. And after graduating, life unfolded in the way it was ‘meant’ to. My then husband and I had retail pharmacy businesses, were financially comfortable, travelled, had children and created a lovely home. I am genuinely grateful for that chapter - the stability, the experiences and the security it afforded me.
And yet… through all of that, there was a tug on my heart that there was something more for me. Something that didn’t fit neatly inside the structure of a career that didn’t completely light me up. Something I needed to make space for—despite no one handing me a gold star for it.
GIVING MYSELF PERMISSION
I had to learn to give myself permission.
Permission to start making jewellery.
Permission to take piano lessons.
Permission to do a market stall.
Permission to create a website.
Permission to explore parts of myself that made no logical sense to anyone else.
Because the thing is, waiting for external validation keeps us small. And the truth is, the only permission that truly matters is the one you give yourself.
So, where in your life do you need to grant yourself that permission?
Permission to Pause
Life can feel like a constant rush. Grant yourself permission to pause, breathe, and simply be. Rest isn’t indulgence - it’s necessary for you to hear your soul whispers.
Permission to Create
What ideas or projects have you tucked away? Writing, painting, gardening, crafting, dreaming? Give yourself permission to create even when no one is watching, applauding, or understanding.
Permission to Be Bad at Something New
Starting something new can feel uncomfortable when you’ve grown up being ‘good’ at things. But no magic will happen unless you learn to embrace the messy beginnings. Give yourself permission to be a beginner.
Permission to Be Curious
Curiosity is your inner compass. Let it guide you. Explore, wander, dabble. You don’t need a reason and you don’t need anyone to validate it.
Permission to Set Boundaries
You are allowed to protect your time, energy, and peace. Boundaries are love notes to your future self.
Permission to Feel
Your emotions are your teachers. Give yourself permission to feel deeply and without shame. Question what your feelings are trying to tell you.
Permission to Rewrite Your Story
You’re allowed to pivot, change direction, start over, or walk away from what no longer fits.
Granting yourself permission doesn’t require a big announcement. It’s a whispered, quiet, courageous ‘yes’ to yourself. Each moment of self-permission becomes a small reclamation. A reminder that your life is yours to steer, guided by your own compass, no gold star required.
Ask yourself today: ‘Where in my life do I need to grant myself permission?’
Write them down. Choose one. Then take one small action that honours it.
Need a reminder? Download you permission slips here.
